Catch up


Well the weekend is over, almost anyways. And a rather busy one it was too.

Friday the start of my busy weekend. Although at the time I didn’t know it was to be  a busy one. It’s a very rare occurence for me to make arrangements which require me to be in a certain place before 8pm on a Friday. And trust me even then I struggle. Anyways I’d arranged to go for a meal with a group of friends from the Thursday night social group. We were going to the local training restaurant for what was likely to be a fun evening, And it was. Great fun was had by all. Although I nearly ended up with no dinner. The menu being rather unspecific, basically failing to mention the inclusion of prawns with the salmon I had ordered. I’d happily have push them to one side but someone else mentioned it to the waiter, who swiftly wiped it away while the chef kindly cooked another salmon minus the prawns! Leaving waiting until everyone else had finished before i had started. Oh well minor hick-up. The chat around the table was full of life, as ever. Touching on a rather emotive subject for me at one point. Every now and then this happens, mostly I manage to remain level-headed then sometimes, usually when I’m feeling a little vulnerable I lose that rationale. Somehow as I looked at my friend to my left saying ‘ There are just somethings which are wrong, being different or odd or unusual really don’t come into my it, there’s a line that should never be crossed’. We were talking about Micheal Jackson, someone said how great his music was I agreed but commented that I didn’t like him as a person that he had done some unacceptable despicable things and being great at something shouldn’t cloud that. The debate began. I have to say it’s something I tend to become quite passionate about this particular subject.  Maybe it was the distraction of explaining to a 13-year-old that moral rights and wrongs exist but in law somethings are unacceptable regardless of the circumstances. That alongside another member of the group trying very hard to introduce new subject matter, which was actually quite funny. He just like made the like really strange statement and everyone kind of looked at him as if to say what? All in all it was a lovely evening. Despite the stress of getting their for 7.30 alongside picking everyone up, as I wasn’t drinking a lovely evening was had by all.
Mind you I can’t believe how tired I was. I had dropped everyone off by 11 yet it felt much later. Not sure if it was the cold or the extra work I had undertaken earlier in the week but boy I was tired. This said I really needed a little time on my own after I had taken everyone home, knowing when I got home there was a high probability my lodgers would be at home I went for a little drive just to clear my head. After about an hour I drove homewards went straight to bed when I got home and literally fell asleep immediately. So unlike me.

Waking the next morning feeling like I’d bearly slept a wink and a head that was more conducive to a night out on the town  rather than an alcohol free evening out. So unfair. Hangover without the fun of the alcohol. Eventually I drag myself from my bed hop in the shower hoping this would help me feel better before heading off to collect my adorable little man from his friends sleep over the other side of town. The shower made a start on making me feel at least alive but it was left to the paracetamol and hot tea to do the rest.

I have to say I can’t believe how tired I felt the whole day (whole bloody weekend actually). Late in the afternoon I drag myself round Tesco’s toying with the idea of cancelling y arrangements for the evening. I’d arrange to met a friend in town, we haven’t seen each other since the summer. I felt bad thinking about cancelling so decided I’d go but not stay out late. It was so busy. Parking was awful but the atmosphere was great. All christmasy. really kind of cosy really. I was glad I’d gone along we had a nice meal, nothing fancy but nice and great gossip he’s one of my great friends and so loves a gossip. Lets just say life hasn’t been smooth for him recently. Mind you it’s his own doing but still he’s been through the mill. The cheeky bugger said he loves meeting up with me because whatever is going on in his life always seems so great in comparison to mine. He’s like ‘yeah when I talk to you mine life kind of rosy’ . How cheeky is that?  So all gossiped out I was on my ay home by 10.30pm. I am such a light weight.  Usually when I get home I like to check my email, watch a bit of telly have a hot drink generally wind down. Not this Saturday oh no I start to go through my little getting home routine but can bearly keep my eyes open, so literally crawl up stairs to bed fall in to bed flaking out pretty much as soon as my head hit the pillow. Unbelievable. Not even one page of my book could I read, not one page.

Sunday morning late for me, I woke about 9.30am with the most awful headache, again. I hope I’m not getting that rotten cold back.

Thinking I had a pretty hectic day a head of me I head for the shower in an effort to shake myself up. My sunday was looking pretty full on. I’d arrange to meet a colleague at school about lunch time. I’d arrange to meet my ex mother in law for coffee, I’d also gotten roped into taking my niece and nephew to see santa’s reindeer. It was starting to feel like I’d arrange too much. However thankfully my colleague moved our scheduled meet later, I then moved my scheduled coffee with my ex’s mother earlier and amazingly the children had been unwell in the night so the reindeer meeting was off. (I know I shouldn’t have been but I was kind of pleased, not about them being unwell but certainly about one less thing in my schedule). Just thinking about my day made me tired. Maybe I am getting that cold again.

Actually despite this tiredness I had a good day, actually a really good day. I spent a few hours in John Lewis had a little browse, bout a few christmas pressies enjoyed a lovely cup of tea and scone. That’s another thing regular English rea is not really agreeing with me but Earl Grey I’m really liking odd. but still it was an enjoyable afternoon tea. Having spent a bit longer than planned in John Lewis I was running a little late for the school thingy. Good job my colleague didn’t mind. two and a half hours later feeling a lot happier about school stuff I head home to make dinner, calling at my parents on route to collect groceries I’d left yesterday by mistake, I’m feeling really cold and very tired. However feeling quite pleased with my day as I set about preparing dinner I get all involved in cleaning. This is generally not a good situation, once I get started that’s it and true to form the dinner happily cooking away, home-made meat and potato pie yum yum… I manage to clean the whole house. I was planning to do it tomorrow but having drag the Hoover I’d just borrowed from my parents, mines broken, it’s a pattern in this house, to hoover the kitchen I figure I may as well do the stairs which leads to bathrooms and toilet then the bedrooms, then I think oh well may as well do the sitting room while I’ve got it out. As I finish one bit of the house I pop back to the kitchen to check on the dinner. Finally all done pastry crust on the pie I collapse in  heap on the sofa. Mind you it’s great the hose it all clean and tidy. I love that.

After dinner I was really feeling pretty exhausted. However I really wanted to do a catch up on my blog so here I am totally struggling to stay awake determined to complete my weekends happenings. i know they weren’t so supper exciting and a little quiet on the disaster front. But that’s good. Doesn’t make for the most exciting read but does make me feel better having recorded the events of my weekend.

I recognise I have possibly omitted some things here. My feelings about some of the happenings. LIke ermmmm how i drove the streets of the city on Friday reliving some of my darkest moments struggling to fight the angry tears, like how it scares the hell out of me that I have someone in my life I might actually tell some of my life secrets and how the evening conversation had reopen wounds I insist on closing immediately. Then about how I might be just a little worried about how tired I feel this week and about how scared I am that my ex’s mother is becoming more frail every time I see her, which is every week. And how I miss my little niece spending the weekends with me…How she filled the gap in my world which sometimes overwhelmed me.

But right now I need to sleep so all of this and no doubt much more will feature tomorrow, I hope depends on what is thrown at me and how much sleep my body will need. Who knows but right now its off to bed… Actually might just have a piece of toast, I’m starving and shattered not a good combination. x

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About angejay18

I am 40 yrs old and i think could be going through a mid life crisis... but i'm not sure. I enjoy writing and am in the process of publishing my 2nd book
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