The week before the weekend

Wow, can’t belive how little I’ve written on my blog recently.

Its been a funny old week really. What with still struggling with my cold, my little cutie being in hospital having her tonsils out, another of my slightly bigger cutie coming down with the nasty cold an ailing father whose health appears to be struggling somewhat. All this alongside my new job in school and individual teaching, chasing publishers to get my book finalised and taking my mother shopping! It’s all happening. My tonsilectomy princess struggling with the whole taking meds, hasn’t actually taken any painkiller since her release from the hospital. This child has the most amazing pain thresh hold. However she does look so frail and sickly its a worry. Why she was release from hospital with a hight temp and racing heart beggars belief really she’s probably better off at home. This I don’t think excuses the release of children from hospital who are clearly not well. On the day she was sent home my sister, bless her as if her life isn’t hard enough had to drag her daughter along to the doctors surgery to be given the antibiotics she should have been given when she left the hospital. Unbelievable. I have to say I’m not about sprawling institutions whether they are medical or educational, bigger definitely isn’t better. It just doesn’t work. |We only have to look at schools with increasing numbers or hospitals which are merged from smaller community resources to larger sprawling facilities just don’t work. No-one knows what the other one is doing. There is no sense of community or caring. Everyone is just trying to do what they can but know there are not enough resources to do it well. Staff aren’t bad or uncaring just run of there feet. Whoever had the idea to locate all women’s and children’s health care on one sight clearly didn’t think it through very well. So as a result we have small children release from hospital after operations without the necessary medication or information and women with potential life threatening conditions left in limbo awaiting results which just never arrive… And this is better… For who I ask?

My mood is lighter than it has been in a long while. My tensions easing (slightly), Almost evident in my relaxed demeena when out with friends on Friday. I actually had a good time and felt happier than I’d felt in a long while.

I know much of my happiness is as a result of the potential future within my reach. I future filled with the pitter patter of little feet. granted we are still in the VERY early stages of the planning process. But I’ve got a good feeeling about it a really good feeling about it. I’ve looked at the possible process and  I plan it right a prediction I was given earlier in the year could well be accurate. A young lady who had been lodging with me for a number of months and became a good friend. Believe she has a gift to read the future. Of this I was a little sceptical but so much of what she said was so bloody accurate, it was impossible to ignore. Well my friend predicted I would have a health baby in 2012. So as I say if things go according to plan I could have a healthy baby in 2012.

And its this hope of a future that brings me such joy. This and the fact that I’ve gotten through a few weeks now without any major disasters.

It’s strange really because I don’t remember thinking that’s it I’m going to be happy. In fact I felt quite tired when I went out on Friday. I’d planned on staying only a short while when I left the house. Somehow I managed to stay to the end of the night. Not only that I danced the night a way in our local. Anyone would think I was completely sossled ! Alas not a chance. two bacardi and cokes that was it. It wasn’t that I’d had a drink It was more than that. It’s like something just switched. Its kind of difficult to explain. But really that doesn’t matter, I just feel more like my old self And that I love.

It’s amazing how when a few things, little things can change he way you feel so dramatically. How a little hope can go a long way.


About angejay18

I am 40 yrs old and i think could be going through a mid life crisis... but i'm not sure. I enjoy writing and am in the process of publishing my 2nd book
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